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An End to Silence

Mar. 31st, 2007 | 11:36 pm
mood: rejuvenatedrejuvenated
music: Erasure "Storm in a Teacup"

It has been a terrible few months. Things have been rather bleak and while it might have been therapeutic to post about each little horrible detail I’ve found myself going even more numb and distant than typical in the winter months. Eventually I might share the tale but rest assured it featured all the traditional crash landings that I’ve come to expect from my life. Silver linings blinding me just long enough to pull me in to the chaos… but I survived; even if I didn’t really want to.

I offer you my love.

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Silent No More

Oct. 8th, 2006 | 08:27 pm

for better or worse i (or at least my alter ego rien) will be playing a show at the Urban Lounge this Friday (the 13th no less) as part of 

SLUG Magazine’s Localized monthly concert series with Subrosa and The Opiate Eye. 

If you’re in Salt
Lake swing by and at least catch 
Subrosa because they’re a noisy bunch of girls.

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Busy, Busy, Busy

May. 10th, 2006 | 01:17 pm

Anyone interested in reading my interview with Roger O'Donnell can do so here. He was quite frank and strangely enough decided to give me a bit of "exclusive" info. It has only been on line for nearly 36 hours and already nearly has 2,000 reads. It has been the most flattering writing experience of my life.

I should have a She Wants Revenge article up in the next day or so as well. Carl McCoy interview to come sometime in June (I'd expect). 

Lots of stuff in the mix...

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to anyone who listens

Apr. 17th, 2006 | 02:07 am

Mini update:


first draft of Unexpected Son “finished” and given to editor (although I’ve since added a few bits and will continue to do so as needed)


you can also begin to circulate rumors that the oft promised but perpetually delayed music entity known as rien will be playing a gig in September (perhaps a warm up or two as well)  audio previews of the disaster will be available at http://www.myspace.com/rienmusic in a relatively timely manor (give or take another 10 years).  


there may be a change of venue when it comes to work. not exactly an escape but a needed rearrangement.


despite my occasional diva tantrums I continue to write for SLUG and will be interviewing Roger O’Donnell in the near future and perhaps that old cowboy bloke from the Nephilim


resident evil 4 is addictive; too addictive.


my family is wonderful. Dave is healthy, mom is a firefly and my sisters are beautiful, spoiled and reasonably happy. Katie just received a partial scholarship for University (the little dancing mathlete that she is) and starts in fall. reminding her that i remember changing her diapers no longer seems funny, it makes me feel old.


forgive my silence; for once it was relatively productive.

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that's about right (not dead)

Mar. 29th, 2006 | 10:48 pm

You Are Kermit

Hi, ho! Lovable and friendly, you get along well with everyone you know.
You're a big thinker, and sometimes you over think life's problems.
Don't worry - everyone know's it's not easy being green.
Just remember, time's fun when you're having flies!

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as if you really cared

Feb. 9th, 2006 | 12:51 am
mood: chipperchipper
music: random new stuff

Sundance Film Festival

My Sundance experience was a bit different this year; thankfully so. My friend Maddy who is back in Utah while she awaits her visa to be approved so she can legally go back to Scotland has a friend named Reneau who was an executive producer on the film Stephanie Daily. The lot of us went to the premier and the after party. Initially I was excited about seeing the film because Tilda Swinton was one of the leads but it was Amber Tamblyn who ended up taking my attention. I wasn’t familiar with her previous work but was quite impressed by the subtlety of her performance. At the party I was able to talk to Amber for a moment, although the subject was her gorgeous dress which I made her model while I asked if it was an antique (“Yes, it’s vintage.”) So much for smoozing my way into Hollywood. At least the cranberry juice was free.

I would also end up seeing Michel Gondry’s The Science of Sleep which is a highly stylized Frenchman’s version of my life with Wren. I’m not kidding. There was also Dreamland which was great to look at but rather shallow and selfish when it came to the characters. Documentaries on how hip-hop influences masculinity among black men, the entertaining rise of the band The Police… maybe there were more. I don’t recall.

Other highlights included some fantastic caramel apples and meeting a friend I’ve known virtually for 7 or so years but hadn’t actually met.

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

Maddy, still stuck in Utah, and I took a drive over to Denver to see BRMC kick off their North American tour at the Gothic Theater. It was nice to catch up with old friends. Maddy loaded them up on candy and sweets to ensure cavities by the end of the tour. Everyone was in good spirits and their set wasn’t as shaky as they predicted. In fact compared to the SLC date a few months back this was a noisier than stripped back. Even the new material came with a bit more distortion and delay.

Opening act The Morning After Girls were brilliant. I’m waiting on hearing the CD before I proclaim anything… but their shoegaze bliss stole the show for Maddy and left me rather impressed as well.

There was no real drunken debauchery to be had after the show… and if there were do you think I’d be the one to tell you about it?

Unexpected Son

The book is progressing nicely. It has taken a bit longer than I expected but for once this isn’t because I’ve been too lazy to work on it. I even had a nice visit with my father’s mother and talked to her a little about the book. I had been nervous that she might be hurt and offended by me telling the story of her son (clearly she plays a role) but she agreed that my mother’s story needed to be out there.


Angela, my editor at SLUG magazine, suggested that I celebrate my 30th birthday in June by playing a gig. Strangely enough I agreed. Nothing is set in stone but now that the book is reaching a point where it is more tweaking than actual writing (well, it will be in the next couple weeks) I figure I might as well dig up all the old demos and put some serious work into getting a live set sorted out…

With a little prodding and support from an old friend I’ve even set up a myspace music rien account which I intend on posting some old demos to see if anyone thinks their worth updating/finishing. It would seem there are a few other bands called "rien" as well so I suppose this mean I have to get big and famous more quickly than any of them....

Certainly you’ve had more than enough of me.

Thanks for caring.

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To the Faithful

Jan. 2nd, 2006 | 12:24 pm

I suppose some sort of update is in order.

I’ve been able to write about 2/3rds of the first draft of what is being called The Unexpected Son. It has been a trial and a labor of love to say the very least. In the coming month I hope to finish the draft and start in on editing in hopes that a second or third draft might be ready for early spring. Once I’m to that point I will aggressively try to find an agent/publisher who is crazy enough to believe in me. Which means it is highly unlikely that it will be released in 2006; a depressing thought considering we’re only two days into January.

2005 was a very dark year full of setbacks and disappointment. Nothing more needs to be said about it. I can only hope that 2006 is a little more bright, perhaps a bit silver along the edges.

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Silent Night

Dec. 24th, 2005 | 10:56 pm

I find myself sitting in my parent's house and it's coming on 11. Everyone else is preparing for bed and I’m setting in and staring at the fact that I won’t be asleep for at least another hour. There is a constant restlessness that stirs me. No matter how tired sleep runs from me.

Hard to believe that Christmas has come so quickly, but it has. The past few months have been difficult. I can’t even begin to explain the mood swings, the exchange of worthlessness and purpose that washes through me in any given day. Darkness with scattered moments of light has become my daily forecast.

I suppose that’s just about too much moody gloominess for a message wishing all of you the loveliest of holidays. Should you find yourself dissatisfied with whatever gifts you may receive I highly recommend treating yourself to the new Kate Bush album Ariel and a bag of European chocolate.

I send my love to all of you.

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for the kids

Nov. 10th, 2005 | 01:52 pm
music: Kate Bush "Aerial"

As a last minute adventure I found myself in Denver watching some band called Bauhaus at the Paramount Theater this past weekend. It was a wonderful performance, although not quite as tremendous as their Coachella appearance it was twice as long (which still isn’t long enough). Quite frankly they’re one of the best bands ever, live or otherwise and each time I’ve been able to see them (this being my 4th) I continue to be blown away by their presence. Daniel swinging the band into an unrehearsed cover of “Rock & Roll, pt. 2” was an unexpected highlight that allowed for more audience participation than would otherwise be expected from a Bauhaus show.

Afterwards there was an after show party at Rock Island. The band showed up but mostly stuck to a small room in the basement. David J did DJ for a bit, which was entertaining because David played his typical mix of ambient tribal, reggae with a block of really mellow 50’s (or 50’s influenced) tunes, an odd Clash cover in a different language and finally a Joy Division track. Needless to say about 3 songs in the little winged creatures didn’t want to leave the dance floor but they were so baffled by the music they limped along like broken androids. Daniel wandered around a bit but was often surrounded by a pack of fans. I’m sure he was in heaven; although after a few minutes he’d slip away only to return and let the crowding happen all over again. He’s the most sensitive ego maniac you’ll ever have the pleasure of meeting.

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baby don't cry

Nov. 2nd, 2005 | 01:08 am

there has been a bleakness to my life for many years. all these years i’ve spent trying to sort myself out so that i could be something more… have they been wasted? there is a purpose to life, it wakes me, beats me around and then kisses me goodnight. there is progress and given a little time there will be a hope that is more than a whisper, more than a simple dream.

i’m sorry i’ve been selfishly away. i’m out of touch with nearly everyone except for my family who have been a delightful escape when i’ve needed it the most. thank God for them.

i’m not saying i’m back, i’m just saying don’t worry about me. i’ve been to hell a few times before and somehow clawed my way back.

there have been many things i’ve been forced to face in learning the history of my father and mother’s brief and sadly painful marriage. so much so that Wren’s behavior/absence/disappointment has only been a sliver to fill in the moments between here and there when my mind is too tired to focus on my father, mother and the child that used to be me.

...not that everything has been horrible without moments of peace. i might be on track for the first time in my life... and i've had a lovely time making a fool out of myself... i'm dancing the pain away just like Roxy Music and Marc Almond told me to... and sometimes, well once, that included a really bad suit from the 70's...

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